Tell your child not to touch a glass piece and the moment you take your eyes off it, there rushes your child to try his hands on the very same glass piece. Snatch away a TV or AC remote from his hands, and he cries out loud for that very remote. Stop him from putting fingers into a socket and every time you leave him alone, he rushes to that very socket. Does this sound familiar? If yes, then welcome to the club of mommies who at some point in their lives said “Hey Bhagwan, kitna Ziddi Bacha hai”.
We always yell at our kids ‘Don’t go near fire. Don’t touch the glass piece. Don’t go outside without our permission. Don’t go near the switch. Don’t cry.. Don’t misbehave..Don’t …Don’t…Don’t….’ It’s natural human tendency to preach and scold anyone and everyone in negation. Little do we realize that kids are curious little sparklers. The moment we tell them not to do a certain thing, their curiosity suddenly rockets to the sky and hence developing an urge- ‘What’s there in it that nobody’s allowing me to touch? Let me try this once!’. All this while parents stay under the impression that they have a problem kid and a really stubborn too. The vicious circle continues making life difficult for the parents and kids alike.
Have you ever tried to get out of this circle? Tried anything except for scolding? If not, then try some of these steps which might help you to understand your kid better and deal with him.
Give liberty to your child : Try to make 1 or 2 rooms “baby proof” (sealing the switchboard with tapes, removing glass pieces and other likely dangerous items) and give him the liberty to crawl around, explore and become junior Vasco Da Gama – exploring the world called home. This would avoid developing temptations in him, hence leaving little room for getting stubborn over things.
Divert his mind: If at all you find your toddler moving in an inappropriate direction, just call him out. If your toddler refuses to sit quietly in a place while eating, give something to engage him. Show him something interesting. Ask him to get you a glass of water or a particular thing from the other room. Make a weird sound. In short, just divert his energies in a positive direction. Children get easily distracted and you should try to make the best out of it.
Wait and watch: Children are very inquisitive and it is their curiosity that makes them explore everything. Many a times we end up hand holding them till eternity. This might result in 2 extremes- a spoon-fed baby or a rebellious one. It is always better to watch your child from a safe-distance, be it while crawling, walking, going to market or school. Keep an eye on him from behind but never lead the way for them. Lessons learnt from one’s own mistakes are better implemented in life than the ones learnt from someone else.
Whatever technique you adopt, it is always important to make your child feel that you empathize with him. He shouldn’t stay under the impression that he is being stopped unnecessarily. A happy, contented child now will grow into a confident, mature adult loved by all.